We’re Raising Kids to Love Sports, Success, and Screens… But Do They Love the Church?
What we prioritize is discipling our kids.
Some would say I’m an intense sports dad.
And honestly… they probably wouldn’t be wrong.
I cheer loud. Probably too loud sometimes.
I coach from the sidelines like my advice is definitely what’s missing.
I’ve coached my kids in basketball, soccer, flag football—you name it.
Now they’re into running and our middle son plays men’s volleyball, which means our lives currently revolve around early mornings, late nights, and figuring out how folding chairs can somehow still hurt your back after only 20 minutes.
We try to make every game.
And if you’re a sports parent, you know how wild that can get.
We’ve driven 2.5 hours for a track meet where my kid ran for less than two minutes. We’ve spent the night out of town so we could wake up before sunrise for a cross country meet that was over before breakfast.
And honestly?
I’ve loved a lot of it.
I know parents who spend every single weekend traveling for tournaments. Families spending thousands of dollars on AAU basketball, dance competitions, private coaching, club teams, camps, and showcases.
Sometimes I hear the numbers and think, “That’s crazy!”
I would do almost anything for my kids.
I love seeing them compete.
I love watching them grow in confidence and win games and get PR’s in their races.
I love being their biggest fan.
But sometimes…
Actually, if I’m being honest, many times…
I stop and wonder: Do they love the church?
Not just attend it.
Not just tolerate it because mom and dad make them go.
Not just because I’m a pastor and they are the pastor's kids, but…
Do they actually love being around the people of God?
Do they see the Church as essential?
Because whether we realize it or not:
What we prioritize is discipling our kids.
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I’m writing for parents and leaders trying to follow Jesus faithfully in a culture pulling our families in a thousand directions.
I don’t think most parents intentionally push church to the sidelines.
I don’t think anyone wakes up and says:
“You know what? I’d really love for my kids to grow up passionate about sports and success but disconnected from the Church.”
That’s not how it happens.
It happens slowly.
One missed Sunday here.
One busy season there.
One tournament weekend after another.
And eventually church shifts from being central… to being convenient.
We still believe in God.
We still love Jesus.
We still “value faith.”
But if our kids were honest about what our family truly revolves around, what would they say?
Sports?
Achievement?
Schedules?
Comfort?
Travel?
Screens?
Would church even make the top five?
That question has bothered me lately.
Because kids pay attention to what gets protected on the calendar.
They notice what we get excited about.
They notice what we sacrifice for.
They notice what we rearrange our lives around.
And eventually they learn what matters most—not from what we say, but from what we consistently prioritize.
That’s the part that sits heavy with me as a parent.
Because I don’t just want my kids to love sports.
I want them to love The Church.
Not the building.
Not hype.
Not shallow Christian culture.
Not church events because their friends are there.
The Church.
I want them to love being with the people of God. I want them to understand that faith isn’t just something you consume for an hour on Sunday—it’s something you build your life around over time.
But that kind of love doesn’t happen accidentally.
I don’t think our kids need parents who make church legalistic.
I think they need parents who make Jesus believable.
We make almost everything the world tells us is important a priority…
…but the things Jesus says matter most for our family often take a back seat.
Convicting, right?
We’ll sacrifice financially for sports.
We’ll sacrifice time for tournaments.
We’ll rearrange entire weekends for activities.
But when it comes to church?
Suddenly we’re “too busy.”
We can travel three out of four weekends every month for sports, but serving once a month in church feels overwhelming.
We’ll spend hundreds—or thousands—on hotels, tournament fees, equipment, travel, and eating out every weekend…
…but then say we can’t afford to tithe.
Our kids can sit through a four-hour track meet in the heat…
…but two church services is “too much” for them.
Because if we’re honest, the issue usually isn’t capacity.
It’s priority.
And kids are incredibly good at figuring out what actually matters to their parents.
Not based on what we say.
Based on what we consistently sacrifice for.
I think a lot of us are feeling this and rarely talking about it honestly.
If you know another parent wrestling with this tension, share this article with them.
I’m still figuring this out.
I’m still trying to navigate the tension between wanting my kids involved in the things they love while also making sure those things don’t quietly become ultimate things.
Because one day sports will end.
The trophies will collect dust.
The schedules will calm down.
The tournaments will stop.
But their faith?
That’s what I pray lasts forever.
I don’t think our kids need parents who make church legalistic.
I think they need parents who make Jesus believable.
So maybe the better question isn’t:
“Are sports bad?”
Maybe the better question is:
“What is shaping our family most?”
Because something always is.
This isn’t about guilt.
It’s about awareness.
Because the goal isn’t to pull our kids out of every activity, live at church seven days a week, or pretend sports and extracurriculars don’t matter.
The goal is simply this:
That our kids would grow up knowing Jesus and loving His Church deeply.
And that kind of faith doesn’t happen accidentally.
It’s built slowly through consistency, priorities, conversations, sacrifices, and the small decisions we make over time as families.
So maybe this week, the challenge is simple:
Have one intentional conversation with your family about what matters most.
Pray together before church instead of rushing in distracted.
Serve instead of just attending.
Protect your Sundays for worship.
Small shifts can create powerful change over time.
Because one day, long after the tournaments end and the schedules calm down, I don’t want my kids to only remember what we cheered for.
I want them to remember what we built our lives around.
And my prayer is that somewhere in the middle of all the chaos, busy schedules, sports practices, and everyday parenting…
they learned that Jesus and His Church were never just another option to us.
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navigating the same tension.
Dustin Dozier is a teaching pastor at Upstate Church, author of The Connected Church, and passionate about helping people build authentic faith and meaningful connection in a disconnected world. He writes about church, leadership, culture, and following Jesus in everyday life. You can learn more at DustinDozier.com.
I see what you’re trying to do with the article. But it misses what Jesus actually told us to do.
Jesus gave us two clear assignments:
1) The Great Commandment
2) The Great Commission
We have love well so you can serve well.
The Pharisees raised their families to love the institution.
They killed Jesus.
A disciple is not a disciple until they make a disciple.
Reproduction is the sign.
Discipleship does not happen inside the church building.
The church exists because discipleship is done well.
We’re a softball family. Some weekends we have two-day tournaments that land on Sunday. We miss the gathering sometimes. That does not mean we miss the scattering.
Our family motto is: “Show a watching world a loving God with living proof.”
So we make it a priority to make disciples where we live, work, and play.
We see the Sunday gathering as a place to pour ourselves out at the altar, so God can use us where we live, work, and play.
A vessel that is already full cannot be used. It is at capacity. A lot of people show up to get “filled up.” That is consumer thinking. The Pharisees lived there too.
On sports weekends, my kids have personally led 11 girls to Jesus and are discipling them. We have baptized every one of them, including in hotel pools.
Over the years, we have led 27 adults to Jesus. Most have been baptized, in pools, lakes, and sometimes at church. We are actively discipling them.
Most of these people would never have walked into a church building.
So we went where they were and became the church for them. Church on the dirt.
This Sunday, before we play, I will lead a small group. There will be 30 to 40 people gathered, hearing the gospel. That is only about 20 less than the average church in America.
That is ekklesia. The church.
Out of this, eight other adults have started similar movements. One started a bow-fishing hobby group. They meet at 2 a.m. on Sundays to go bow-fishing. In four years, he has baptized 50+ people. Over 200 people show up. Five years ago he was just a softball dad who heard the gospel from me, said yes, and now he is changing lives.
So do not fall in love with “church.”
Become the church, the ekklesia, where you live, work, and play.